If you have ever been in a love relationship or are currently in one, you can attest that it is one of the most fantastic things that could happen to a human being. If you’re fortunate enough to love someone who loves you back, my dear, you’re on top of the world. However, love may be a knife that cuts your heart apart at times. Your sweetheart, who is normally the source of your joy and laughter, may suddenly become the source of your sad tears.
How would you react if your sweetheart called you and said, “My life hasn’t been the same since the day I met you, baby. I adored and treasured you dearly. Thank you so much for everything you’ve done for me. But I’m sick and tired of this relationship. I’d like us to part ways. I truly require some breathing room. Will God provide you with the man (or woman) who is destined for you?” I’ve seen people take their love partners to some cool and memorable destinations merely to throw a “farewell party” for them. During the farewell party, before the breakup is announced, the other partner may be thinking, “he loves me; she loves me!” Breakups are sad, devastating, and heartbreaking, especially when they occur when you least expect them. It produces a heart wound. It causes the heart to become heavy and torn apart. It’s an experience that most lovers never want to repeat.
What should you do and how should you handle a breakup? The majority of people react negatively to a breakup. Some people are quick to retreat into their shells. Some people will cry for days, weeks, or even years! “I will never love again,” some would remark. Some people even utilize it as a means of retaliation, becoming professionals at breaking other people’s hearts. What should you do after a breakup if it’s clear that your boyfriend will not return (not soon, not ever again)? We will now discuss what can be done in no particular order.
Talk to others: Most of the time, heartbreak is not a battle you can fight alone. Because of the burden that heartbreak brings, it’s a good idea to chat with some supportive people about it. You can confide in a friend, family member, or anybody else you trust. These folks may not be able to help you bring your partner back, but their words (and even deeds) might be a soothing balm for you. Do not say, “I don’t want anyone to know about it.” The truth is that nothing new has ever happened on Earth. Some people have gone through what you are going through right now. Speak up; don’t perish in silence. Psychologists and counselors are helping people to talk to if you have access to them during this difficult period (most especially when you see that the hurt is affecting you badly in other areas of life). Your counselor does not have to be someone who will charge you a lot of money for counseling sessions. If you look around, you will notice some people who have the gift of counseling; they have been of great assistance to many others. They will also be of assistance to you. And if you have to pay for the services these individuals will provide you, isn’t your happiness worth more?
What could be more valuable than money? The bottom line is that you should not isolate yourself. Speak up and seek help to alleviate the burden that a split entails.
Read godly literature: There are numerous books available that address the issues of breakups and heartbreak. One thing about these books is that when you get to the place where your difficulty is handled, you feel a sense of serenity, rest, and reassurance. You always have the impression that a big load is being taken off of you and some refreshing water is being poured on you. Many people in this generation do not read; it is a shame that we have lost our reading culture! There are so many things you need to know that you will never learn in school. Life is a learning institution that extends beyond the theories and principles taught at school. Get yourself some non-academic, life-oriented, soul-lifting, and life-changing books to read, study, and apply! Books by Joyce Meyer, T.D. Jakes, David and Faith Oyedepo, and others will be extremely beneficial to you. They are divine texts with divine teachings. When choosing a book to read at this tough time, choose the ones that address your issue; you will recognize them by their titles. It is critical to emphasize that you do not read to ditch the books. What is required is that you apply anything they teach you. If you read a thousand books in thirty minutes and never applied what you’ve learned, you’ll be just as depressed as before. As a result, be the doer of the word rather than just the reader.
When I was grieving due to the loss of a loved one, this was something I did regularly (and I still do it now, even after my healing): I listened to godly motivating songs. They eased my soul, healed my wounds, and offered me hope for a better tomorrow. Listening to such tunes helped me. That gives me the confidence to recommend it to anyone who is going through a similar ordeal. My tunes were essentially chosen by me. Songs are energizing; music is like a fountain of flowing water that cools a hot heart! Look for your music and artists. Choose the songs that bring life to your spirit and soul, and listen to and sing the songs that help mend your shattered heart.
Do yourself a favor and forgive. It’s amazing how quickly pure love can transform into passionate anger and bitterness. We’ve seen examples of alleged lovers pouring acid on the person they claim to love after the individual dumps them. Numerous life-threatening threats are flying around here and there. Of course, I understand how tough it is to let someone you care about depart. Letting go of someone you once had and losing that person to being possessed by someone else drives you insane, but wishing your ex-lover evil and threatening them is impolite. Yes, you may be hurt and have the right to be hurt, but hurting people hurts people! Do you know of any favors you can do for yourself, my friend? Forgive! Simply forgive! I know it’s not an easy thing to do, but it’s best you forgive. Forgive your ex-partner for offending you. Free him or her from the clutches of your emotions. Allow them to depart. “If someone leaves my life today, it is simply because another person who is far better than the one who left is coming in,” I will always repeat, and that belief has always proven positive in my life.
So it doesn’t bother me when someone decides to leave my life. It is my life, which God has bestowed upon me! As a result, I don’t cling to someone who isn’t clinging to me, which makes it simpler for me to forgive. Aside from that, it is a command from God to forgive those who trespass against us. If you forgive your attacker, God will forgive you for your transgressions. It’s simple (albeit not easy): I want to be forgiven, so I forgive. You will find serenity when you forgive your ex-lover for shutting you out in the chilly weather. I’m talking to you: forgive, forgive, and forgive some more. You may reach a moment where you realize that you are the root of the split. You become angry with yourself; you aggravate yourself. You blame yourself for the relationship’s demise. It’s a good thing to realize that your relationship’s failure is partly due to your actions, reactions, and inactions. But you must still forgive yourself. You must forgive yourself just as much as you must forgive your ex-lover. Don’t cling to the cross for too long. You must forgive yourself. Forgive simply and completely.
My heartfelt wish is for you to be healed of your wound and restored to wholeness. May your joy and gladness be returned seven times over. As you live to realize your dreams, may you find peace and love that gives you a good sense of your humanity? Even if no one else loves you, realize that God does.